Film Theory: The Super Mario Galaxy WILL DIE!

TL;DR

The tiny planets of Super Mario Galaxy require black holes at their cores, which will eventually evaporate via Hawking Radiation, dooming the galaxy.

Key Points

• 1.The watery Drip Drop Galaxy planet has an impossibly strong surface gravity. Using kinematics on Mario's jump height (155 cm tall, 456.73 cm jump, 400ms fall time), the planet's surface gravity calculates to 37.71 m/s², nearly 4x Earth's 9.81 m/s².
• 2.Drip Drop Galaxy is shockingly tiny but absurdly massive. Mario takes 56.8 seconds to swim its circumference, giving a radius of just 6.33 meters (20 feet), yet its mass is 22.6 trillion kilograms packed into that space.
• 3.The planet's core density of 44 billion kg/m³ is impossible for normal matter. Earth's densest natural material, osmium, is only 22,600 kg/m³, and even the densest man-made element, hassium, reaches just 41,000 kg/m³ — billions of times too low.
• 4.A black hole at the planet's core is the only scientifically plausible explanation. This aligns with the actual Super Mario Galaxy game, where many planets visibly have black holes at their centers; the Schwarzschild radius of this black hole would be just 33.4 femtometers — about the size of a proton.
• 5.Hawking Radiation will eventually destroy the black hole and the galaxy with it. The Drip Drop black hole radiates at roughly 5.45 billion Kelvin (37,000x hotter than the sun's core), slowly bleeding mass over time until it ceases to exist.
• 6.The Super Mario Galaxy will die in approximately 30.7 quadrillion years. While enormous, this is a cosmic blink — the universe is only 13.8 billion years old — and the planets will lose gravitational cohesion and break apart long before the black holes fully evaporate.