Make Dating Fun Again

TL;DR

Dating feels like a chore in 2026 because apps and rules have stripped out the fun — reclaim it by flirting boldly, romanticizing dates, and ditching rigid TikTok guidelines.

Key Points

• 1.Modern dating has become numbing due to app culture. Swiping, texting, disappointing dates, and starting over creates a cycle that makes people feel numb and hopeless, unlike the lower-stakes, curiosity-driven dating of previous generations.
• 2.A 2024 Date Psychology study found 45% of men ages 18–25 have never approached a woman in person. Alex argues in-person flirting is a dying art replaced by fire emojis and story likes, and women need to take matters into their own hands.
• 3.Alex's college bar story illustrates fearless in-person flirting. She wrote her number on a napkin under the fake name 'Catherine,' handed it to a professional hockey player at bar Brahman in 2016, and turned it into a fun night out for her whole friend group.
• 4.An NPR article advises reframing flirting as making the other person feel good, not chasing a goal. Removing the 'relationship escalator' mindset — date, relationship, marriage, kids — and simply aiming for a pleasant conversation eliminates the fear of rejection.
• 5.Building social muscle in low-stakes daily interactions is essential practice. Complimenting someone in a coffee line, chatting with a coworker, or briefly talking to a seatmate on a plane rebuilds face-to-face social skills eroded by constant phone use.
• 6.Romanticizing your pre-date routine transforms the entire experience. Alex recommends treating getting ready as an event — favourite songs, a long shower, a new outfit, a selfie, and even pre-date drinks with a friend — so the night has value regardless of how the date goes.
• 7.Four viral TikTok first-date rules are actively killing the fun. Alex specifically calls out: always going to the same venue, drinks only/no food, setting a strict 2-hour time limit, and never kissing on a first date — arguing each strips spontaneity and joy from the experience.
• 8.A friend's five-hour bar-crawl first date turned into a relationship, proving arbitrary time limits are counterproductive. Alex contrasts this with TikTok's 2-hour rule, saying good connections should be allowed to breathe naturally rather than cut off by a phone alarm.
• 9.Alex's first date with husband Matt — a wall make-out after a 2-plus-hour dinner — is her proof that following your instincts beats rigid rules. She argues kissing or even sleeping with someone on a first date is fine; a man's future behaviour is not determined by your physical choices on night one.